Understanding Willpower and Laziness
A large number of people consider themselves to be lacking willpower or consider themselves lazy in certain areas of life. This occurs often in regards to health and fitness.
To improve our performance we must first become self-aware. This article will explain this in more depth https://www.nantnissen.com/improve-performance/acceptance-and-improved-performance/
The willpower and laziness theory is something I have seen and heard for all of the time I have been in the health and fitness industry and has been increasing since the rise of social media, media influencers and our ability to now compare our normal to other people’s best or worse, their pretend best.
We should all over the place
We will hear most people say “I should do this, I should do that”. Often when we say this, we don’t actually understand why, and it may not be something we aspire to do anyway. We just think we “should” because social media, the mainstream media or people in our lives say so.
Without an awareness of how we actually do want our life to look and why we do want to achieve our goals, we end up thinking we should do this and that while living other people’s expectations and lives.
Telling ourselves that we are just lazy or we lack willpower, while not understanding what we do want and why we have the habits we do, this self talk erodes our self confidence and fills our minds with limiting beliefs, that we end up living up to.
What is our self talk?
The common phrases are “I just don’t have the willpower” “I know I’m lazy” “I know I should but I can’t be bothered” “I really want to but something is holding me back, I’m not sure what it is, I think I just don’t have enough willpower”.
I hear these all too often and these comments, these beliefs do nothing for our desire to achieve our goals. They in fact become a self-fulfilling prophecy, something that we fall back on when we don’t follow through and achieve what we want to achieve.
Now it is true that we need to make our health and fitness a priority. We need to put ourselves first. We all have the same amount of time in a day. We need to just take action, even when we don’t always feel like it. We need to find reasons and solutions instead of excuses and why nots!!
If we were to change that self talk and understand why we do what we do, we could progress without the limiting beliefs and self sabotage patterns. When we have the skills and tools to change how we think about ourselves, we can build the habits and patterns that support our goals and the so-called laziness and willpower challenges drift away.
Staying stuck in the “I’m lazy, I have no willpower mode”, only serves to keep us stuck! We need to move to the, I don’t want to do that, I choose not to do that mode.
Do you really lack willpower?
The problem is, it isn’t just willpower that prevents us from being healthy and fit. It isn’t just us being lazy!!!!
When you get up exhausted, tired from life and the kids need to be looked after, tell me it’s willpower.
When you have dealt with your emotions and life for the last 30 years by getting help from your so called friend (food, alcohol, TV, etc ), and you don’t know how to deal with yourself otherwise, tell me it’s willpower.
When your exhausted after a long day at work that you don’t enjoy and it takes an hour to get home, sitting in traffic, tell me it’s willpower.
When you wake, not looking forward to the day because you can’t get your head off the pillow and you don’t have the energy to deal with your colleagues or deadlines tell me it’s willpower.
When you have a loveless relationship or get put down on a regular basis and don’t know where to turn, tell me it’s willpower.
When you are embarrassed that you let yourself get this way and the gym seems scary, tell me it’s willpower.
When you’ve already made hundreds of decisions before lunch, you are tired and hungry and just want something to eat before your next meeting, tell me it’s willpower.
When you get up super early to help the kids before school, do drop off, then go to work, to go home exhausted, to cook dinner for everyone, tell me its willpower.
When you haven’t been taught how to eat for you and you are now on your 10tth diet that is working in the short term but you feel restricted, hungry, tired and grumpy, tell me it’s willpower.
When you feel generally unwell, tired and foggy and don’t know how to feel better, tell me it’s willpower.
When you think you’re doing everything right to eat healthy and haven’t even been taught the basics and what you’ve googled is confusing or not working, tell me it’s willpower.
When you dislike what you see each time you look in the mirror and you tell yourself so, tell me it’s willpower or that its laziness.
When you have pain in your body and it takes all your energy just to hold that in your body so you don’t scream at everyone during the day, tell me it’s willpower.
When you feel so uncomfortable in your own skin that just moving in your clothes feels uncomfortable and you feel like a fraud showing happiness all day, tell me its willpower or that its laziness..
When you are just tired from life and are desperate to gain energy, to wake up feeling great and looking great, but nothing you do seems to work, tell me it’s willpower.
When you look back to fonder days, when you did bounce out of bed and laughed every day, but don’t know how to get back to that state, tell me it’s willpower.
You see, it isn’t willpower. You are not lazy.
So what is it?
- Does a lazy person get up early, for a job they dislike?
- Does a lazy person work all day to come home and cook for the family?
- Does a lazy person get up exhausted, put on a happy face and get through the day the best they can?
- Does a lazy person do the things they don’t want to do all day, just to provide for themselves and their family?
- Does a lazy person keep searching because they know there is something better?????
You are not lazy; you do not lack willpower!
What you lack, is love for yourself.
What you lack is an understanding of what works for your body.
What you lack is an understanding of what it is you really want.
What you lack is an understanding of how to effectively deal with your emotions.
What you lack are the skills and tools to navigate life and what happens in life.
What you lack is a belief that you really can be as great as you are.
What you lack is the education, support and guidance about your body and health, how to understand your body and the signs, signals and symptoms it shows you.
What you lack is the accountability to take those action steps.
What you lack is the community of like-minded people who will bring you up, not tear you down.
I’ve never met anyone with a willpower problem.
I’ve never met a person who is truly lazy, yet still manages to hold down a job, to create a life and do the best they can each day.
We all are doing the best we can with what we know –What if you knew more though? What if you knew what could really help you?
What else is it?
I have met thousands of people with priorities that don’t suit their goals.
I have met those with health challenges that don’t know how to heal from.
I have met people that are simply exhausted and don’t know how to feel better.
I have met people who have never been taught about their body, what is right for them and what suits them.
I have met people who want to be the best version of themselves, but they have a set of sabotage patterns, belief systems and habits that keep them where they are.
I have met people who are constantly seeking answers to their health and fitness challenges, only to find things that work for short periods of time, that set them back and that invariably cause them to feel worse about themselves.
Stop calling yourself lazy! Stop telling yourself you have no willpower! Stop allowing other people to call you lazy and suggest you have no willpower!!
Get to the underlying causes of what leads you to take the actions you take, seek help from those who can provide an environment for you to be the best version of yourself and never look back. You’ll find you never had a willpower problem after all!